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How To Grow or Establish Any Relationship With Ease

I recently had lunch with a Team Leader who works at a Keller Williams office.  The Team Leader told me that their recruiting goal was 4 agents a week.  When I asked them how many agents they had recruited over the last 6 months they told me 5.  I was shocked to hear that their results were so low considering the Team Leader’s past success as an agent.  That’s when I decided to dig a little deeper.
After a few more questions I found out is that the Team Leader didn’t have problems getting face-to-face meetings with agents they wanted to recruit.  Where the Team Leader was struggling is identifying what was really important to each agent, and then showing them how their model would give the agent the value they were seeking.
This barrier lead me to sharing my relationship framework with the Team Leader.  It’s a simple way to identify what’s really important to anyone you want to form a relationship with, whether that be a personal or professional relationship.
Here’s how the framework works:
  1. Every relationship you have or want to have works just like a shared bank account.  Just like a real bank account, if you went to the bank today and had not made any deposits but wanted to make a withdrawal the bank teller would tell you; “Sorry, you don’t have any funds available to withdraw.”
  2. In order to make any type of withdrawal you must first make deposits.  Just like a real bank account, you can’t make withdrawals that are larger than the cumulative deposits you’ve made, or you’re going to run into trouble i.e. the relationship will dissolve (account closed).
  3. Just like a bank has a currency of trade so do relationships.  If you went to your bank today with Euros and tried to deposit them the bank teller would tell you “We don’t take Euros.  However, if you convert those Euros into US funds we’d be more than happy to deposit the funds into your account.”  What this means in terms of professional relationships is that if a meaningful deposit equals one-on-one mentoring, but you only offer a person a written guide to success chances are they will not see this as a meaningful deposit into the relationship account.
  4. Identifying what a meaningful deposit is easy, you just ask.  Based on the person’s response to that question will immediately tell you whether or not you’re able to make the deposits they require.  If you’re not able to make the required deposit then you’re wasting everyone’s time moving forward with a relationship because IT WILL FAIL.
  5. If you’re able to make meaningful deposits into the relationship account then the next step is to identify to your relationship partner the types of withdrawals you intend to make.  This sets a clear expectation and gives you a future point of reference for measuring the account balance.
After I shared this framework with the Team Leader, the very next week they used it to recruit 4 new agents, and have sustained their conversion rate ever since.
I personally shared my relationship framework with a lot of people I come in contact with.  It allows me to cut through the chatter and get to a deeper understanding of what others really want and need out of a relationship with me and or my company.  A huge side benefit is that approaching people in this fashion gives them the sincere impression that you care, and that your intentions are not disingenuous.
The last, and most important finding, is that the framework saves me huge amounts of time for three reasons. First, I don’t go around making deposits into relationship accounts that I can never make a withdrawal.  Second, I also don’t waste time making non-meaningful deposits. Third, I don’t have to guess how to make meaningful deposits into relationship that I care about.